Life as a Pumping Mom

I have to admit that life as a pumping mom is not as easy as it seems. The frequent pumping (8 times per day, once every three hours) makes outings or doing anything at home difficult. Also, pumping in the wee hours is beyond exhausting. Pumping does not mean feeding. So after pumping, I need to wait for Bethany to wake up to feed her. So, the challenge is really incorporate my pumping schedule into Bethany's schedule. Mom has been doing the feeding mostly. A few times I did both the pumping and feeding, and it takes about an hour and a half for both.

Lately, I have been having issue with my left boob. Yes... I know this sounds really personal... but my blog is set at private, meaning only selected family members and a few close friends get to read the update of our lives. It started two weeks ago. My left boob was super hard and sore, and even after pumping, the lump did not go away. I googled about clogged duct and mastatis and almost got myself a heart attack. I do not believe in self-diagnosing but lately, I rely heavily on google in getting me the answers I need for the condition in my left boob.

The lump usually goes away in 12-24 hours. So this week Tuesday am, the lump came back for no reason at all. I pumped before going to my dentist appointment. The pain was so bad that I had a hard time sitting still on the dentist chair. By the time I got home, I pumped right away, hoping to relieve some of the pain and pressure. Unfortunately, it did not really do the job, and the milk from my left boob was less than usual (about 1.5oz instead of 2.5oz!) At this point, I was in so much pain that I had to take a Tynenol (which according to my GP, it is safe and only a tiny weeny amount will get into the breast milk). The afternoon went for so quick as I was in so much pain, and at the same time, was getting super worried and frustrated. By 8pm tuesday night, after pumping, the lump went away, and once again, I was a happy pumping mom again!

Wednesday mid afternoon, the lump came back. This time, I was like,"OMG! Am I going to have this everyday now?" I tried everything I could to relieve the pressure; hot shower, cold compress, massage... and nothing seem to work. By Thursday morning, I was so discouraged that I started to think about perhaps my pumping career has come to an end, and I need to give Bethany formula from now on. With mom going home this saturday and Joe being at work all day, what if the lump comes by and I am severely engorged, and it hurts so much to pick up Bethany? What am I going to do? At this point, I feel so helpness as I am the only one who can give Bethany EBM (expressed breast milk)!

Understanding all the advantages of BM, it is my plan to give Bethany EBM for the first 6 months and when it is time to introduce solids to Bethany, I will give her 50% EBM and 50% formula, and gradually wean her off EBM. As much as I want to stick to this game plan, the pain that I endured in the last few days have gotten me thinking... Can I really do it?

I thought about asking my GP to give me medication to stop milk production, and get Bethany on formula right away... in this way, I can have better use of my time during the day, give more attention to Bethany, plus no longer need to live in the fear that I might have clogged milk ducts, or even worse, infection in the milk ducts. However, on the other hand, seeing Bethany growing bigger and bigger everyday puts a smile on my face. Knowing that her immune system is getting stronger everyday due to my BM is very rewarding. Everytime when I look at her little peaceful face is a strong motivation for me to keep pumping as I know I am doing the right thing to give the best source of nutrients to my daughter.

So, to pump or not to pump... that is a question. As much as I hate to live in fear of clogged milk duct or milk duct infection, I will continue to pump until it comes to a point that I can't tolerate the pain! I am seeing my GP tomorrow and I will for sure discuss this with him. As long as he can prescribe me a medication that prevents the ducts from clogging, I have no problem pumping 8 times a day.